Friends equal traitors
by chat avec yeux bleu
Summary: There are certain things in the world that always end up revolving around them… The two of them… He broke her heart; he's mending her wounds… He helps her up while the other one pushes her down... Her head is on limbo and he just can't give up...
1. Chapter 1

**Friends equals traitor**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the characters they belong only to Masashi Kishimoto and his crew.

**Pairings: ****Sasuhina** and a little bit of **Itahina **and Sai can be pretty observing and sexy.

**Summary: **There are certain things in the world that always end up revolving around them… The two of them… He broke her heart; he's mending her wounds… He helps her up while the other one pushes him down.

Nights become overwhelming, there are things in the world that no matter how painful they are, always bring upon a bright outcome. Sai had been there with her, his humor ever changing, but making her forget all about that void inside her chest, he made her feel good, yeah, like a painkiller when a headache is killing your patience, and she honestly could not have enough of that man, that man that was her best friend above all things. She sat silently on a cream colored love seat as she deeply stared at her dark surroundings.

_I wonder what Sai was thinking… He looked off the hook today… Maybe… _

A knock on the door interrupted her train of thoughts. She was supposed to be asleep, that's what she had made Sai believe just before he left. She wasn't in the mood to receive anyone, so she pretended that no one was calling to her… Pretending? Damn word got her train running again.

†††† _Flashback _††††

"-Hinata… There are things in this life that are worth the riches' man treasure… But there are just some things that cannot be replaced… Not even by the presence of god…"- his voice, as usual was like velvet on her ears and heart, his hands always soothingly cold and warm at the same time. She has never ever dared to look up to him and tell him what she felt, what she wanted him to do to her.

"-Itachi-sama, could you touch me… I want you to touch me…"- her eyes couldn't encounter his face, her face flushed beet red and her hands fiddling with her hair.

"-Hina-hime… Don't say such things, because honestly I don't know what I'd do if I lost control…"- Hinata felt his lips on her neck, soothing, burning, freezing…

"-Itachi… Please…"- she reached for him, but he began fading…

†††† _End of_ _flashback _††††

Her mind focused again on the conscious world. She was still in her room, sitting on the same couch, and apparently she had fallen asleep, because the sky was already turning a dark blue. _I really need to take some air…. Even after he's dead… He smothers me… _Tears began forming, and threatened to slip out. She forgot about the shower, the sleeping robes, the people… She just wanted to breathe and calm her storming soul. She walked out of her room and headed to the hall, empty… It made her remember something else… After her blunt confession in battle to Naruto, she had never felt so free, so out of her cage… But he had chosen Neji, he had confessed to Neji on a drunken night and who would have thought Neji shared the blonds' feelings. She smiled at the memory of Neji moving out of the Hyuga household. As she wondered around the house she reached the back garden and decided to sit there… Her favorite bench, the bench where she…. Oh god the tears…

†††† _Flashback _††††

"Hey Hinata-kun… I was wondering if you grew a third eye… What the heck is that thing between your eyes…"- Hinata held her hands to her forehead and blushed…

"- Sai-kun don't be soooo mean…. That's a zit…"- she puckered her lips and drew her tongue out.

"-Can I draw that face on my sketch book? I bet it'll scare the cats out of my house…."- he grabbed her cheeks and pinched them, making a funny face.

"- You're so cute Hin-chan…"- his nose grazing hers, making her insides become a mess. Her head became light headed and fainted.

"-Hinata-hime…?"- Sai looked at Hinata, who was beet red and hot. He caressed her face and bent down to kiss her. His lips lightly touching hers… Hinata never got to see the face of her best friend, never got to see the small smile that drew on his lips or the tears that formed in their corners.

"- I love you Hina-hime… I love you"- his hands still on her face.

†††† _End of_ _flashback _††††

She had a dream, a dream that same night, the night when Sai left her alone in that bench, the day Sasuke Uchiha came to her house and ruined everything with the truth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

**A/N: I know this story has a lot of flashbacks and that it can pretty annoying, but it will be necesary for my dear readers to understand what is gonna happpen eventually...**

** ††† Flashback †††**

"-Hey Hina-kun, I'm going out of the village for a couple of days... I guess that my bashing presense will not accompany you for the outcomig days..."- his smile was always the same, that same creepy grin that made his eyes close and look kind of chinese.

"-Sai-san that smile of yours is kind of creepy..."- she covered his face with her small hands. Sai chuckled and held her wrists.

"-Hina-kun your hands are as cold a a corpse's"- he kissed her hands and then looked at her face.

"- I have a pretty bad feeling about this... I mean about me leaving... I don't know but you feel... Somehow stormed..."- he looked at her again before standing up. There was a sketching pad on the bench and he turned around to leave.

"-Sai-san you left your pad here..."- the pale boy turned around and faced her with an exasperated look on his face, and before she had any time to analyze what was that look for, he had the pad on hands and he was dissapearing through the trees.

"-Ummm good bye... I guess..."- she felt a little guilty, but shook away. She sat there and stared at the sakura tree on her garden and sighed. It had been so long since she had seen him, since she had felt him.

"-Itachi-sama... Why?"- she touched her face and lips and had an intense need to cry. She missed Neji, somehow he made the days at the mansion better, she missed Naruto, it was always fun and cheery when he showed up randomly and made everything better, she missed the silly chit-chatting with Ino and Sakura, she missed reading alongside Kakashi-sensei and she missed the afternoons with Kurenai-sensei's son, that little boy that reminded her so much of deseased Asuma. She missed Kiba and Shino, and she missed her little sister Hanabi... But they were all gone... Kiba got relocated alogside the whole Inuzuka clan, Shino also moved away when his clan decided to mke a relocation as well, Hanabi was moved out because she was to marry someone out of the country, Naruto had moved away with Neji, and Sakura and Ino had also moved away because no one was willing to accept their relationship...

She felt so alone... It was heartbreaking.

"-Sai... Please come back soon...I can't take this loneliness..."-she covered her face wit her hands and laid down on the wooden bench. She did not wanted to think about anything, she just wanted to rest and forget about everything, she just wanted to move on.

It was in that very moment that she felt someone... Someone was in the gardens with her, a very familiar presense.

"-Is this what you plan to do all your life... Cry and remember things that will never come back..."- it was the Uchiha, the only person that was still close her still, yet so very far away.

"-Why are you intruding in my house... Can't you see no one has summoned you Uchiha-san"- she looked at the ground as she sat down again. She remembered that she had left her coat inside, since it was Sai that was with her she really didnt feel any embarrassment and had walked to the gardens without wearing her large coat, and had the need to immediatly sit down and cover her chest from view, after all her tank top only left many things to anyone's imagination.

"-I have no need to be summoned Hyuga, I came to do a favor you presumptuous bitch..."- he approached her and slammed her down on the bench again. It surprised her, the sudden attack of the Uchiha, and she had no time to prepare for comeback attack and left him to lay on top of her.

"-What the hell do you think you're doing!"- his face was solemn and he remained quiet, staring intently at her and not saying a word.

"-He's gone..."- that was all he said, but it was all she needed to know, it was all she had to hear to understand what he meant.

"-Jaja... What are you talking about... Uchiha-san...?-" there was not a single sign of amusement in his face and there was a hint of sadness there as well. She wanted him to get off her, she wanted him to go, but first tell her that he was lying and that he just wanted to mess with her... With her head, with her heart,a dn above all things, her soul.

"-Be gone Uchiha-san... GO!"- he remained unmoving, he remained there, looking into her eyes, her eyes... Only her dear...

"-Uchiha-san..."- he wrods became sobs, her heart could no longee take it, the silence. the lingering sensation of being broken inside, of cold water drowning her soul, numbing her senses...

Itachi-sama...

Sasuke, leaned down and sobbed. She heard him, she felt his hot breath tickle her ear. she felt the tear on his voice, she felt the anguish inside him, she knew he was probably as broken as she was... Or worse... Never! Nothing could be worse than what she felt... Not even hell would compare...

"-Hina..."-before the words could come out,she slapped him, she smacked his face and wriggled, trying to free herself, wanting to run, desiring to get out, to find him in the woods, to know he was...

"-No more Hyuga!"- his lips crashed onto hers, surprising her, surprising himself. The surprise was not enough to stop him, to stop his tongue from slipping into her mouth, his hands from cupping her face, touching her body, her body that was only his...

"- Itachi-sama!"- her words came out in sobs, her heart feeling like it was being split in two. Sasuke's kiss only felt distant, yet warm, and maybe comforting.

**††† End of flashback †††**

It was weird because, she found herself, laughing in the gardens, all by herself as she remembered the way Sasuke had fucked her the day he told her...

"-You're dead... So dead... And everyone is gone! Gone like all my hopes..."- she felt dizzy, and a little drunk, even when all she did was sleep, wake up and walk here... And now that she came to think of things, she hadn't seen anyone in the house, and it had been quite some time... Only Sai, and for some reason, he always looked... Sad.

"-Sai-kun... come see me please... I need you here with me..."- she sighed as she laid back on the bench again. The memories were coming back, maybe like a soothing medicine to kill her pain, or maybe to torture her soul.

**††† Flashback†††**

**(A/N: I know it's annoying, sorry, it's like the anime, sooooo much flashbacks) **

Somehow, Sasuke had dragged them both to her room, to the only place where she hated to be... Alone of course. But' she wasn't alone, she was with company, one that would make her feel alive. His hands felt hot on her body, his lips, everything about him was so much desired in that very moment. He touched her everywhere, his body felt extremely comforting to her.

"-Touch me! Uchiha-san..."- he stopped to look at her and without a second thought, he grabbed her on his arms and placed her on the bed, looking at him while he removed his clothing.

"-This is not something I wanted to do... Something I had forbid myself of... But now you've asked for it..."- he laid on top of her as he slowly kissed on her neck, and jawline, his hands exploring her body, slowly caressing her exposed thighs.

**††† End of flashback †††**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

She had lost count of how much time had passed since she had walked outside and had sat on the bench. She was there lying on it, apparently dozing off. She always had the faint sensation someone was doing things to her, as if she was being watched or that perhaps in her meals or drinks there was something funny.

Nevertheless, she discarded the thought, after all she was not living alone right? Even when in the past days she had not seen anyone around. However, it did not matter, no one in the family cared about her, and she did not cared about them either. Only Sai mattered, only Sai was her only companion, of course, He was the most important person to her, but somehow it was very painful to remember his name, his face… Anything about him. She wanted to forget about Sasuke, how he had made her… dirty?

"-Itachi-sama… When will I see you?"- she walked around the gardens and looked at the sky, once again feeling touched, feeling alone, feeling like she was sinking into despair again, maybe a glass of water will help. She headed to the door from where she came, and walked in, feeling the emptiness of the mansion, something awfully strange, but a feeling she had been getting used to for the last past days. She walked the entire hall, remembering many moments she had live there through her whole life, her miserable childhood. She found the kitchen and walked in, finding no one in there, but not thinking about it, she reached for a glass and poured water in it, sat on the kitchen counter and gulped down the water. Feeling suddenly dizzy, a headache began forming and she dropped the glass, clasping her head for comfort. The pain was unbearable, it was too much for her and for the first time in her life she wished for her death…

"-STOP IT!"- no one would come for her, no one would come because she was alone, alone and….

"-Crazy! Hina-chan! Stop screaming… Jeez you scared the beejezus out of me"- Sai was with her, he was sitting on the bench, with her head resting on his lap. She was sweating, and she had the very faint sensation of a lingering headache as she sat down.

"-Sai... What time is it?"- she looked at his smiling face, that face that made her feel so good. His smile did not waver and she smiled back to him, she also noticed that her clothes were not a robe, and that she was not in the kitchen, hurting and wanting to die.

"-It's afternoon... Dear god what's your problem?"- she looked around and found herself wearing the same clothes she was wearing the day Sai left for that mission and that Sasuke had come to tell her...

"-Hey, girl! You're spacing out again... You did that a few minutes ago and fell asleep... Are you planning on leaving alone for another hour...?"- she knew he was joking, but she could not help but feel guilty, so she sat down and looked at him and the sketchbook on his hands. Apparently he was drawing something, something he was not going to let her see, because somehow she had seen this all before...

"-Sai... What are you drawing?"- she looked at the sketchbook and then at him, smiling. He recoiled and then smiled back at her.

"-Well Hin-chan, I promise that when it's done I will show you"- he closed the pad and put it in the bench, exactly where she had seen it in her... What was it, dream? Memory? Who cares, she saw what it was going to happen and she was not willing to let that be. Sai stood up and shook the leaves that had piled up in his clothes, the pollen and the dust as he looked at her, looked at her with such, passion, sadness? What was the feeling?

"-Sai... When you come back, could you come here first thing?"- she looked at his face and smiled as she spoke the words. Her words struck him with surprise, but he smiled and caressed her face with the back of his hand.

"-Of course dear girl... But don't complain if I'm all bloody and stinky... Or if I get here in the middle of the night... First thing is you then..."- he waved his hand and disappeared, this time she was not going to tell him about the sketchbook, that way she would get to see it. Maybe what she had seen had been a premonition, and she could somehow modify the future to her very will and desire. She grabbed the pad and walked inside before Sasuke could ruin her life.

She locked herself in her room and laid in the bed, sketchpad on hands and smile on her face. She opened the pad and began looking at the drawings. At first only there was ambiguous drawings about different places and random people she didn't know, only one drawing of Naruto was all she could recognize, and the last page, the one he was sketching on this afternoon when he was there with her. But before she could look at it, Sasuke was there, in her room, standing in front of the head of her bed. Her eyes widened and she knew what was to come, but before he could say anything she covered her ears and began screaming, screaming so loud, not even she could hear anything but her own breathing.

He surprised her by grabbing her arms and tossing her to the bed. She remembered this scene, but this was not how it was supposed to happen, he was supposed to be kissing her, and touching her and making her feel alive, but he was mistreating her, he was about to make her be the most miserable person in the world.

"-No please don't do this! Don't say anything!"- Hinata screamed to the top of her lungs as he crawled his way up to her.

"-Hina-hime... wake up"- and she saw him, it was her dear Itachi-sama, his red eyes staring back at her, hipnotyzing her, making her feel warm and wobbly inside, his face, his face that was always so calm, and the marks under his eyes that gave away the difference between him and any other Uchiha, so why on earth had she thought this was Sasuke.

"-Wake up...? But I'm not..."- her world suddenly became faint, and she felt reality slip off like water on hands. She tried to grab him, she tried to keep a grasp on him, to make real that moment, that small moment.

"-Itachi-sama don't let me go!"- before she returned to the real world, she saw the look on his face, it was sadness, but that was not the face of Itachi, it was someone else... It was...

"-SAI!"- she looked at him, and looked around, she wanted to see if this was some kind of memory again, but she found herself on the kitchen, her hands bleeding and her head hurting like hell.

"-Sai? Sai what are you doing here?"- she looked at him as she straightened up and tried to catch a breath.

"- Well you did tell me to come here right after I was done... And here you have me... What are you not happy to see me?"- he looked at her face as he helped her straight up. She looked at him as she brushed back her hair and smiled a little.

"-How much time has it been?"- she looked at him and then at her clothes and kitchen, surely if someone had seen there that someone would have woken her up, but no one did, no one.

"- Eh, a day... The mission got cancelled halfway and I decided to come to you... Like you asked me to do... Woman, I swear you're losing it..."- when she was about to step to the floor, Sai surprised her by lifting her up on his arms, she blushed and looked down.

"-Hey, wouldn't want my sweet Hina-kun to step on broken glass..."- he smiled as he walked back to the room with her.

"-Say, Sai... You were here last night right? How come... Weren't you supposed to be on a mission... That mission you spoke to me about..."- Sai looked startled at her blunt words, but chuckled.

"-Do you believe I would lie to you?" he asked jokingly, but somehow she knew he was seriously asking.

"-No... But... Last night... I... You..."- she looked at his face and felt stupid, and wanted to cry, but shook it away and puckered her lips down in a frown.

"-God you're so damn cute!"- she blushed again and looked at him and then down. Her old habit returning for a brief moment, the one where she fiddled with her fingers.

"-You know what worries me? Your little head here darling..."- he touched her forehead and kissed it.

"-Why? What's wrong with my head... Do you think it's not okay... Do you think it's malformed?"- she covered her head and was surprised when Sai threw her to her bed like a sack of potatoes.

"-Sai-kun!"- he was laughing, not because he had thrown her, but because she looked a little frightened.

"-Hina-hime..."- at those words something inside her flicked on. She looked at him and felt such anger inside her chest and could not contain herself...

"-You're not ITACHI-SAMA!"- and both remained quiet.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"-Of course, I'm not Itachi, Hinata-san "- there was an awkward silence, and she had never heard Sai sound so cold. She covered her mouth, trying to take back the words she had spat out in bitter anger.

"- Hinata-san I think I'm better off back home "- he looked down, trying to avoid her eyes, her beautiful silver eyes.

"- Please Sai, don't leave me Don't leave me alone I didn't mean to say anything "- she looked down and began crying, feeling like her heart was being ripped apart again, feeling lonely and angry at herself. She felt like the air was not reaching her, and that she was unable to breathe

"-Hina-kun I want to help you"- he looked at her, his black eyes meeting hers, making her remember how to breathe, easing her soul, making it all better Like always He grabbed her by the arm and raised her, pressing her body to his, their faces only inches apart, his breath tickling her face, her heartbeat raising, her mind become a blur again She tried to avoid this feeling, this feeling Sai brought up.

"-Sai I'm thirsty "- she avoided looking at him and tried to wriggle off his grip, failing when it only became stronger and more firm. She wanted to weep, she wanted to get away from him, run away and fly away, but somehow she was always trapped, fallen into a hole, her wings clipped off But Sai... Always Sai...

"-Hinata-san... I don't want to let go, ever..."- his eyes pinning to hers, those beautiful eyes that reflected the real beauty of her soul, those shinning silver orbs that he wanted to see forever. She felt overwhelmed, she felt like she being sweeped off her feet, like she was dreaming, like she was somehow entrapped in a beautiful fantasy,  
>but... She did not wanted that to happen, she wanted to stay in the dark, she wanted to remeber him, even if it meant suffering, she did not want to stain his memory with anything... Not even the happiness Sai brought.<p>

"-Please... Let me go..."- his lips captured hers, his mouth hot against hers, his free hand slowly tracing a path up her back, soft and entrapping, he slowly made her lay down on the bed he had previously trhown her into, lightly placing his body on top of hers, trying to make her feel as comfortable as they could ever be... His mouth never leaving hers, his lips soft against hers. Her heartbeat began growing, and she didn't want that to happen, she wanted her heart to become frantic only when she was with "him", not with Sai, not with anyone, no matter how much she loved him, no matter how much she cared for him . Her pleads were in vain, because his love for her was relentless, and no matter how much she begged for him to stop, he never would...

††††

"-Sai..."- he bit on her neck, drawing pleasure to that spot, making her tingle, suckling on the skin, making her moan in utter surprise, his hips grinding against hers... She wanted this to happen, not because she thought about it, but because who bettert than Sai to make her feel happy...

"-Please... You're hurting me..."- his hand caressed her face, her neck, her chest, his lips following the trail of his hands, his body pressing against her even more, the heat so intense it overwhelmed her, even when she was burning up in this heat, but his hands were so cold... So cold it chilled her soul...

"-Hinata-san..."- his tongue touched the skin of her neck, making her feel things she never wanted to think of again, making her lower body tingle with anticipation, making her want him, even when he was not "him". Sai's hands traveles her body, her hips unconciously mounting up, trying to reach him, pleading silently for him to go farther. He placed his hand on her lower back and raised her gently, raising her robe and lowering his kisses even more, placing a tiny trail of kisses down her stomach, softly biting her abdomena and going lower, lower... Her legs trembling, her heartbeat raising up...

"-Oh God... Sai... Stop..."- at the mention of his name, Sai stopped, his face slowly raising up... And even when black eyes stared back at her, they were not warm... And even when his pale face held those endless black eyes, it was not Sai... His hair slightly longer, bangs framed that face, and his face as apathetic as ever.

"-Sasuke-san..."- she remained laying on her bed, with Sasuke on top of her... And once again she thought in how the fuck could she have had mistaken Sai for Sasuke...

"-Don't ever call me that name..."- he grabbed her face, his hand pressing her face, causing her pain, even when his features remained unchanged, there was fury in them, anger, something in them that made her stay still, trapped like a rabbit caught in under wolves predatory rampage. She felt afraid, and once again had the faint sensation she was dreaming like everything around her became a mess and that things began losing sense... Where her heat, emotion, and feelings felt far away... So far it stopped being real, his touch, his look, his face...

"-Sasuke...kun..."- her mind became a blurry maze and she just wanted to give in a fall into the depths of darkness that wanted to grasp her soul. And before she could give in, he felt hands touch her face, she could hear that voice in her head, Sai's voice... His soft voice that alleviated her... And when she could no longer hold on... Everyhing went black, and she had the awful feeloing of being trapped in thick water, so thick it crushed her body with its weigh, so thick it made her feel like she could not breathe... And then she saw him... A hand reaching for her, a very familiar arm she wanted to grasp and never let go... But it was so far away... So deep... She fell in so deep that no one would ever reach her... Not even...

"-Sai..."- she began sobbing, the desperation only becoming worst, her head turning into an atrocious fiend...

††††

Her head became a mess, when he kissed her, everything became indefinite, like once again she was dreaming... But those lips were still there, kissing her body... Her body that was naked already, her body that was being touched, and there was another naked person there... With her, sharing a sacred ancient dance... Living the ultimate act of love with Sai... But even when her mind could not understand what was going on, he was not willing to stop... He would love her until the end, because even if she drowned now in despair, she would come to, come back to reality and see him, see him with her again... See that she was still alive, and trying to make her mind cme back, because she was still alive, because he was gone and she was still alive, but he was not the only problem apparently... There was also Sasuke Uchiha to worry about...

"-I love you Hina-san"- he kisses the gap where shoulder and neck met, he sunk deeper into her, and even when she was hallucinating on who knows what, her body danced along with his, she moaned... Not his name... Nor Itachi's... It was Sasuke... Sasuke was what she kept saying... More like crying... She cried... She was in pain... And instead of letting this make his head run and plot... He kissed her more, he kissed her as much as he could... As much as his heart wanted to claim her... Make her his and his only... So for now he just held her down and pounded into her body with love... A love that would never measure anything... Because who would have thought Sai... The emotionless stud... Would fall for a broken girl that was unable to love him back.

**(A/N: This can be pretty tiring and I guess I don't want to take the lemon too far... I think the site would ban for it... Mine could be pretty MA+ 0.0)**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

**(A/N: Hopefully, this will get a Little more interesting, I mean, Hina is kinda out of carácter but then again we never really know how the characters truly are, and from my point of view, the Hyuga's a pretty crazy and tragic… ****Especially my emo buddy Neji…. -_-)**

She forgot how long she had been lying there… On her bed, with him. With Sasuke Uchiha. When she recovered consciousness, when she remembered the reason why Sasuke was here on the first place…

"-Itachi-sama!"- she sat down, her heart beating frantically, somehow, making her feel good… Not because this was good for her, but because this is what her mind wanted, she thought she didn't deserve to be happy anymore, and she even thought that Sasuke was part of this punishment, him always reminding her that she was a worthless piece of shit, and with him gone, she would never be happy again… And everything returned to this moment… Again, him forcing her… She began crying, covering her face in shame utter shame.

"- And you keep crying…"- he sat down, exposing his full back to her, surprising her with a sight she would never forget, scars, scars everywhere…

"-Why is it that every time I fuck you, you cry and say… "Itachi-sama"… Ugh, it makes me sick"- he stood up and stretched his back and arms, and took a quick glance back at her. In his eyes a small hint of amusement.

"- I don't mind you screaming Uchiha-san when I'm fucking you, but please when I'm done, try not say… "Itachi-sama"…"- he turned around and faced her again. It was still uncomfortable to have him naked with her, but what could she say about it. Sasuke looked at her and she moved her face away and frowned, feeling suddenly angry, wanting Sai to be here with her, to make her stronger. For some reason at the very thought of Sai, she smiled and it was as if Sasuke was reading her mind… Because at the exact moment when she thought of Sai, he frowned and when he saw her smiling, he snatched her body from the arms and raised her.

"- He's not here Hina-san… I am, and he will never ever make you feel the way I do…"- and he bit her neck, he bit so hard she screamed in pain and pleasure. Sasuke smirked and slid his hands down her naked back, his hands seizing for her butt, his naked chest pressing against hers, this actions making her go insane, making her lose control of her body… Ws this the punishment she deserved for ever loving an Uchiha? And not this particular Uchiha that forced to have sex… No, no, one that was long gone… Gone? Where?

Again, she had the need to weep… When her chest began heaving up and down and tears rolling down her cheeks, Sasuke stopped and looked at her… She looked so fragile and so… Adorable… He had to have her… Repeatedly, because even when her little heart belonged to his dead brother, her body could always be his and her mind could be tormented by only him, because other than love the second strongest feeling was hatred… And if Hinata Hyuga was not willing to love him, then she should hate him, and of course he would be more than pleased to oblige her in that matter. He pushed her to the bed and enjoyed the terrorized expression on her face, savoured the way her eyes filled with fear, but her body reacted with anticipation. It was simply marvellous.

"-Hina-chan… Do you hate me?"- he lowered his face to have hers close to his. He tilted his head a little to his right as he asked the question, took a bang of her hair, and smelled it… For some reason she could not focus on him… Of course, she did not hate him, but she did dislike him strongly, still she knew that what he wanted to hear was that she hated him, that she loathed him with the innermost part of her being… He made her so angry… She wanted to hate him, but more importantly… She wanted to get away from him… Because even when he was the one that killed Itachi, when he was the one that kept hurting her… She could never find herself hating him… Not now, not ever.

"- Sasuke-san… I…"- she was so angry, she wanted to scream, scream so loud she would die… But that was not going to happen, why? Because she was not a coward. Dying would be the simplest way out, would be the painless escape to this suffering… She wanted to go insane and forget everything, but everything was so real… And she knew there was more… More than just Itachi's death…

"-Yes… you what Hinata… Say it… You…."- he mocked her as his hands made their way to her feminine core, as his hands touched her with brute force and made her want more… Sasuke held her face in a menacing matter and looked at her face closely… Hating that there was no hatred, no loathing there… Nothing but desperation… That only made him very furious… Not even her hatred was his… Why was it that even in death, Itachi always took away everything that he wanted… Everything that seemed to bring some sort of happiness to him… His family first… His innocence… His capability to love… Her… Her love… And now… She could not feel anything… Not for him, not for anyone… No one but…

"-Itachi-sama! I hate you!"- she screamed, finally letting out that snake that was choking her, strangling her very sanity… At that Sasuke stopped short… Every other feeling in him vanished like a puff of smoke… He felt suddenly blown away… Like something inside him broke… Something that would never ever be repaired again… And who was the culprit… She was… No…. Itachi… Again!

"- I hate… you…. My god…Just…let… m..me g..go"- her voice seemed to be trapped in small gasps of air, and Sasuke was too awestruck to say anything or to even let go of her. She wriggled her arms trying to get free but before she did, a very painful struck, slammed her back to the bed… Her hand moving to her face, covering the place where Sasuke had smacked her… Sasuke now leaned close to her again… Raised her bodyt and slammed her against a wall, punching her face, slapping her across the room and pushing her until she fell on her knees… This was painful but it was what she deserved for ever loving and hating the wrong person, maybe she should have accepted that marriage proposal Kiba had made her, or maybe she should have fled with Shino like he wanted, but she did nothing of the sort, because somehow her heart wanted only Itachi and she would wait for him until the very end… Even if she had to die… Like…

"-Who do you love Hina-hime…"- his eyes looked dangerous and his hands were closed into fists she knew would meet her again, she closed her eyes and looked at Sasuke's gleaming red eyes, yes the only quality about Sasuke Uchiha that hypnotized Hinata… His sharingan… So without thinking she hopped back to her feet and pounced Sasuke, moving her body against his, in a way men could never resist, because even if Sasuke was stoic and serious a man with a dick, was a man with no shame in sexual contact… So she carried on and bit him, sucked on his neck, kissed and licked everything that composed his neck, chest and abdomen… Sasuke was clearly surprised at this, but he was more than willing to let her go on, so he laid back and enjoyed the moment…

Kissing, yes it made her feel so close to him, his large hands would travel her face and stop at the nape of her neck, because he was always so gentle and he would always tilt her head up a little for better access, when kissing her… So soft… So tender…

"-I love you…."- the words were always whispered to her… Like a lullaby, like a song she never wanted to end…

Sai watx=ched her as she slept, not a peaceful sleep apparently, because she was sobbing in her sleep, something that made him feel very powerless… He wanted her to wake up, he wanted her to be okay…. But that could not be apparently…

He looked to his right and saw his sketchpad, he gently placed her head on the pillow and walked towards the table where it was. He had told Hinata he would show her the drawing he was making when he returned from the mission, but when he arrived… Thing would never ever be the same… Maybe this was the punishment he was getting for leaving her alone when all of this happened… At least, she could take on the comfort that everyone was still…

"-Alive…Ita…chi…sama is… ali..ve"- she was mumbling again. Sai was pretty sure that what had broken Hinata's sanity was not… That tragedy… but something else, something much deeper and darker than what Tsunade could ever figure out… That's right… He had to see Tsunade… But he didn't want to leave her alone…

"-I love you Hina-chan… Be back in a jiffy"- he placed on his clothing and walked towards the window, not scared of leaving the sketchpad there, because even when he wanted to be the one to show her the drawings, she would never reach it, she would never touch it… And that hurt… Because it made him feel guilty…

**(a/n: Well I guess things are becoming more clear now that you've reached this chapter... There are people that get fed up of reading such long stories, but honestly this is kind of long one... ^^)**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

The blond woman sat there, on her desk, biting on the tip of her pen, looking like she wanted to punch the paper that sat in front of her. She fell lonely without Shizune to help her, mostly because she had very little patience with the written work, and Sakura, well she was not coming back… Tsunade thought about a certain blond and his lover and smiled a little, at least they haven't returned, things were pretty ugly in Konoha and the more they could stay away the better, after all things were a mess and they had just been married… Or something like that. She felt someone enter her office and she straightened up, trying to look as sober as she felt.

"-Tsunade-san."- it was Sai, that ROOT agent that decided to stay here after all. Tsunade knew that he was supposed to be some emotionless freak or something, but he had changed somehow, eversince he met Naruto and Hinata Hyuga, especially the girl… Tsunade sighed and looked at the boy's apathetic expression and frowned…

"-Could you smile for me… That face pisses me off and reminds me that we're grieving boy…"- she rubbed her head and looked to the floor, now that she thought about it it had been about a month since she had a drink, and to her surprise she did not miss is it one bit… She had been drunk that day… Moreover, even when she was retiring… She was still Hokage and her duty was to maintain peace and order… However, she had failed… And Sakura could not be… Or the Hyuga's…. Oh God again the awful guilt and pain… Sai became concerned when she remained quiet for too long and he tapped her on the shoulder… Tsunade jumped at the gesture and pushed him away, she was caught in a daze and had not noticed when he approached her…

"-God boy… Sorry I hadn't had a drink… I think I'm going crazy…"- she massaged her temples and looked up at him, a strange smile plastered on his face, she made a face and looked away angry…

"-On second thought… Do not smile… It is creepy, do it when you feel like it… Now boy… I have her papers here… I know you are concerned about her health and I am more than in debt to… Anyone… So here you go… Take a seat because I have many things to explain to you…"- Sai grabbed the folder she offered and sat on the chair in front of her desk and looked at her before he opened the folder. He sighed and opened the folder, Tsunade never spared a look at him because she seemed to be lost on thought and Sai didn't want to interrupt, so he looked at the papers and read… It was true that her health had been delicate, it is true that she was not okay and that she was supposed to stay closed in… But how much of that did she really do… He was pretty sure that Sasuke was not helpful in that matter, because he did not understand she was ill…

††† Hinata's place†††

She felt like she had been sleeping for a very long time, her body ached, but there was no one there in her room with her, she knew she had not been alone, but she could not remember if she was dreaming about Sasuke or Sai, so she just sat down and looked at her hands… They were bruised, so she must have been with Sai… She vaguely remembered the kitchen, and then… Oh that's right, she had fallen asleep on the bench, went to have a drink and fainted… Sai had found her… She touched her head and sat down. Her body ached, and she also recalled the beating…. Sasuke had kicked the shit out of her… But when? What was going on… Her mind could not make sense of the timing of both events… And for the first time in who knows how long, she felt like she could reason clearly… She was thinking… She was still wearing her robe, so she had not moved out of here, her body had not been cared for, she was growing hair on her legs, armpits and she felt dirty… She wondered how long she had been sleeping, and why were all her memories scattered. But before getting into deeper thought she headed to the bathroom and locked herself there…

†††† Back with Sai †††

"-But what do you mnea she's not recovering!"- Sai felt awful, like somehow Tsunade had crushed his hopes… Because he wanted to save her, he wanted to remove her from the pain she had gotten caught into… He was feeling unable to cope with the pain this news brought him, so he stood up and placed the folder on the desk again. He looked at Tsunade and then to his side, he wanted to cry, he wanted to fall to his knees and cry out, because he never thought loving someone could be this painful, but he would not lose his hope, he would not lose it… Not just for his, but for her sake as well…

"- Tsunade… I'll be heading back to Hinata, I don't like leaving her alone for too long, see you another time…"- the boy turned around not sparing a look at the woman, because he knew that his eyes were swelling and that tears would surely follow… He never knew sadness could be this horrible, he hated that feeling, that brand new feeling that marked him inside and made him feel tortured in a immeasurable manner.

Tsunade saw him out, she remained sitting in her desk, not saying anything, but feeling like a piece of shit, she hid her face in her hands and for the first time in 9 years she regretted returning to Konoha….

Sai walked silently back to the Hyuga's domain, lost in thought, wanting to reach Hinata as fast he could, but at the same time feeling like he didn't want to go back at all, knowing that when he looked at her, he may not contain his tears or his pain. But he had to do this… For her…

As he walked the dark and lonely streets of Konoha, he saw him… Was that… Itachi Uchiha…? Sai felt frozen, he felt smething inside his stomach clench in pain, and the intense need to follow that person that looked awfully a lot like Uchiha Itachi. When the other saw him it fled, moving to the shadows with great stealth, but Sai knew best how to deal with this situation and drew his paintbrush and scroll of paper out of his satchel and drew…

"Stop!"- and the creatures that had emerged from the paper trapped the person, well at least its clothing, tearing it apart, giving Saia chance for Sai to see a mane of black hair… When Sai arrived to the monster he had summoned, in the floor laid an ink stained cloak, a very familiar cloak, one that was black with puffy red clouds lined in white…

_The akatsuki… Itachi Uchiha … He's… alive… _

And again that feeling returned to him, but this time it was worst, his chest felt incredibly tight and his voice strained inside his throat… He felt like something inside him broke and was sucking in everything, with so much pressure it hurt… It hurt more than anything he'd been through… He grabbed the cloak and stood up… Then, for a moment of blank thoughts… He remembered Hinata was alone and with more than enough reason he ran to her, she had to be home, she had to be okay, she had… Had he visited her?

"-Hinata!"- and he ran he ran as fast as his legs would let him… Because he loved her and he did not want her to be alone… He did not wanted her to suffer any longer… He was after all… Her friend… Right?

"-DAMN!"- he wanted to run and never stop, because this hurt… Because this feeling was driving him insane… He just wanted to run… Run…

(A/N: Cryptically … I'd say this is just awful… -_- I still ask myself what inspired me… And then I find myself listening to songs I used to cry over when I was depressed… Wow!)


End file.
